Patton Oswalt’s Star Wars Filibuster

Author: blogadmin  //  Category: Premium Comedy

If you consider yourself a fan of Star Wars, Marvel or Parks and Recreation and you have not seen the Star Wars filibuster by Patton Oswalt, we recommend you do. It is a hilarious seen on Parks & Rec where Patton’s character conducts a filibuster to share his eight minute vision of what he believes the new Star War Episode VII should look like. The movie poster (created by EW) below brilliantly incorporates all the charters from his vision. If you would like to watch or re-watch the brilliant filibuster we have provided the video below as well. Enjoy!….nerds…..

Patton Oswalt’s Star Wars Poster

Watch the clip of Patton Oswalt’s filibuster:

Buy Dom Perignon at Costco without a membership

Author: Julien  //  Category: Premium Advice, Premium Comedy



In order to make this article “premium posts” worthy I decided I would share a way to buy “Dom Perignon” at a discount warehouse club store without being a “card carrying club member”. :) If I remember correctly, a bottle of 1998 Dom Perignon at Costco is about $100 while the same bottle of Dom Perignon will cost you upwards of $130 at most other stores.
Dom Perignon

Please note that in addition to Dom Perignon, this will work for all types of alcohol! So, if you rest assured that in most areas, this trick also applies to all top shelf liquor, booze, beer and wine as well!

So, if your one of those people that loves “sticking it to the man” or if you’re the type of person that enjoys causing “a scene” in public, and you like being “that guy” that holds up the line while the clerk calls for a manager (over the loud speaker), than this experiment is for you! Thanks to a little-known state law that dates back to the 1930s, (when Prohibition was repealed); nonmembers can purchase alcohol without paying a membership fee. These laws state that applicants for a license to sell booze must “serve the public need and protect the common good.” In other words, alcohol is an invaluable and essential item that must be readily available for purchase by the general public with no membership restrictions! ;) HaHa

Taking advantage of this deal depends on where you live, and at which discount club you shop. This should work at BJ’s Wholesale Club, Costco and Sam’s Club. For example, if you live near a Costco than membership is not required for purchases of alcohol in the following states: Arizona, California, Connecticut, Read more…

The Office: Support the Rabid Bracelet

Author: Julien  //  Category: Premium Comedy

If your a fan of “The Office” than join Michael Scott in: Michael Scott’s Dunder Mifflin Scranton, Meredeth Palmer Memorial, Celebrity Rabies awareness fun Run, Pro-Am race for the cure!

Rabies awareness funrun flyer

On the other hand, if you’re not willing to run 5,000 miles, but you do want to show your support for Rabies awareness then you can buy a “Support the Rabid” bracelet (in order to raise awareness to the fact that there is a cure for rabies)! :)

Support the Rabid Bracelet

Below is a short clip from the Fun Run Episode of “The Office”:

You can also click on the link below to find some other amazing Office gifts (including a “Shrute Farm Beats” and “Dunder Mifflin Support the Rabid” tee shirt)!


P.S. I just ordered a couple bracelets and looked everywhere for them. They cost about $5 at the NBC store which was cheaper than anywhere else. Let me know if you find them for less, but they were selling on eBay for almost $15… Ouch!

Iran so far away SNL skit

Author: Julien  //  Category: Premium Comedy, Premium Fun and Entertainment

My friend Bobby just sent me a link to this SNL skit entitled “Iran so Far Away”. Its another Andy Samberg creation and although I dont think it is as good as the Emmy award winning Dick in a Box skit with Justin Timberlake, it is definately going to be another classic! This time Andy teams up with Adam Levine from Maroon 5. Let me know what you think!

In case you want to sing along here are the lyrics:
SNL?s ?Iran So Far? Lyrics
They say true love comes only once in a lifetime
And even though we?re from opposite ends of the earth
My heart tells me you?re the one for me

Mahmood, I remember when it started, saw you on the news
You hating gays, I was eating food
I was feeling you, and even though I disagree with almost everything you said
You ain?t wrong to me, so strong to me, you belong to me
Like a very hairy Jake Gyllenhaal to me
Mahmoud, make my heart beating out of my chest
my mind says no but my body says yes
You ain?t no threat, the only threat I see, is the threat of you not coming home with me
Our love for each other is like when atoms collide
Can?t express how I feel, and yo Adam let?s ride

And Iran, Iran so far away is your home, but in my heart you?ll stay

He ran, for the president of Iran
We ran together to a tropical island
My man, Mahmoud is known for violence
Smiling, if he can still do it then I can
They call you weasel, they say your methods are medieval
You can play the Jews, I can be your Jim Caviezel

S&M, when we?re wrestlin?
You can be the port that I put my vessel in
So I try to do it but you can still see me
With your sleepy brown eyes, butter pecan thighs
And your hairy butt? Yeah.

And Iran, Iran so far away
Come home, and in my arms you?ll stay
Used to look at the stars and dream
Around the world the same stars we?re seeing
And a twinkle in your eyes Mahmoud

Talk smooth to me, in the night sky
With you pants high waisted, damn so fly
We can take a trip to the animal zoo
And laugh at all the funny things that animals do
Like Eugene, you got me straight trippin? boo
Hope you look at my eyes and say I?m trippin? too
You say what but they already do
You should know by now, it?s you

You crazy for this world Mahmoud
So give us another Holocaust all you want
But you can?t deny that there?s something between us
I know you say there?s no gays in Iran
But you?re in New York now baby
So time to stop hating and start living

Terry Tate Office Linebacker

Author: Julien  //  Category: Premium Comedy

A funny video that my buddy Bobby just sent to me. This is a compilation of all the Terry Tate commercials from 6 or 7 years ago. “Terry Tate Office Linebacker” was a commercial series that Reebok created in which Terry Tate (played by Lester Speight) an NFL linebacker is employed at a corporate office. I believe this originally aired as a Super Bowl XXXVII commercial. If you aren’t familiar with Terry Tate – Office Linebacker, all you need to know is that Terry’s job is to keep the office staff in line, and as you will see, he “gives out the pain” to those who are not obeying the rules. Funny stuff!

Buy a video game character for only $400

Author: Julien  //  Category: Premium Comedy

Wow… what a deal! NOT

This isn’t exactly a “premium post” but I suppose you could say it fits into the “premium comedy” section! (BTW if you don’t think this is funny I would suggest that you’re a huge nerd. No offense)!
So… I was looking for a computer on Craigslist today and I came across an amazing post. Apparently you can buy and sell video game characters. Someone is offering to sell his character from the “World of Warcraft” game for $400. Mind you this is not a video game for sale but rather a character that someone has created. He is selling “a Level 70 Human Rogue on the Alliance side of the PVP server Baelgun” (whatever that means)
More importantly it states that the character is transferable with 60 days of play time and the seller states that he expects to get multiple offers because this is a good deal. (Just a thought, but for $400 couldn’t you go to “Dave and Busters Restaurant” every weekend for 60 days and get an unlimited arcade game card, 5 or 6 beers, some food, a little bit of human interaction and the remote possibility of maybe even meeting (or at least talking to) a girl? Just a thought.

Anyway, it seems to me that for $400 your average gamer would probably buy an XBox 360 or a PS3. What I want to know is, who is spending $400 on a video game character (and please don?t tell me that it?s because the character has high ratings, lots of power or even super awesome looks)? Seriously I need help understanding this!

Side note: If this is for real I might consider getting into the videogame nerd business. Can anyone advise we on weather or not this is as good a deal as the seller states? If so I might have to post this incredible investment opportunity to the “premium investments” section of my blog.

Anyway here is a direct quote from the post and a link to the original post:
link to the original post if it is still up on Craigslist

“His Ret weapon is The Oathkeeper

His Healing weapon is Mogor’s Anointing Club
The Shield for the Club is Draenei Honor Guard Shield

He has +650 to healing with his healing gear and +500 with out the club and shield
He also has 300+ to damage

He is 260/300 Blacksmithing and 130/150 Jewelcrafting

He has over 100 Gold

Armor is:

Lawbringer Gauntlets
Judgement Legplates
Heavenly Inspiration
Shamanistic Helmet of Second Sight
Vengeance of the Illidari
Brooch of Hightened Potential
Burning Blade Cultist Band
Sage’s Band
Lawbringer Boots
Light-Touched Breastplate
Fairweather’s Wristguards
Avenger’s Waistguard
Spell-slinger’s Protector
Lawbringer Spaulders”

So for all you World of Warcraft gamers… what were you most impressed with? Was it the “Light-Touched Breastplate” or the “300+ gold?”
For me, I would have to say it was the “Heavenly Inspiration” that really blew me away!

Update: OMG I just had a heavenly inspiration of my own! I was inspired to never EVER play World of Warcraft!

Prison Mike scares the office straight

Author: Julien  //  Category: Premium Comedy

This is for all “The Office” fans out there!
I just realized I don’t talk nearly enough about the NBC show “The Office” and since it is probably my favorite show of all time I figured it was time to start mentioning it! I am not much of a TV watcher but this is the one show that I have purchased every episode of, and I can watch it over and over again. It is also a show that I have come to quote in my daily conversations with friends (never quoted a TV show before).
Below is just one of many great images that I captured of Michael Scott as he “scares everyone straight” with his Prison Mike impression in “the Convict” episode. I was thinking of spending a bit more time on these and making higher resolution images available for download as desktop backgrounds if people are interested! Let me know what you think.

I also wanted to mention a great fan site for “The Office” for those of us who can’t get enough! Its LifeintheOffice.com and it is continually updated with current info on the show. It includes quotes, video and audio clips, show info, ringtones, interviews with the cast, a forum and an RSS feed… (which I subscribe to)!

Prison Mike

CONTEST ANNOUNCEMENT: Within the next couple of weeks I will be dropping a couple discrete quotes from The Office in my blog posts and the first one to realize it and point it out by leaving a comment will win a Dunder Mifflin T shirt !!!

Here’s the segment of the episode that features “Prison Mike” :

Dick in a box

Author: Julien  //  Category: Premium Comedy, Premium Gifts

In case you missed SNL a couple weeks ago… Justin Timberlake and Andy Samberg collaborated on a new heartfelt holiday music video! Check it out, I think this one’s even funnier than The Chronicles of Narnia music video! :)

And for those of you who want to sing along to “Dick in a Box” here are the lyrics:

Hey girl I got somethin’ real important to give you So just sit down and listen
Girl you know we’ve been together such a long long time (such a long time)
And now I’m ready to lay it on the line
(Wooow) You know it’s Christmas and my heart is open wide
Gonna give you something so you know what’s on my mind
A gift real special, so take off the top
Take a look inside — it’s my dick in a box
Not gonna get you a diamond ring
That sort of gift don’t mean anything
Not gonna get you a fancy car
Girl ya gotta know you’re my shining star
Not gonna get you a house in the hills
A girl like you needs somethin’ real
Wanna get you somethin’ from the heart
Somethin’ special girl
It’s my dick in a box, my dick in a box babe
It’s my dick in a box, my dick in a box girl
See I’m wise enough to know when a gift needs givin’ (yeah)
And I got just the one, somethin’ to show ya that you are second to none
To all the fellas out there with ladies to impress
It’s easy to do just follow these steps
1… Cut a hole in a box
2… Put your junk in that box
3… Make her open the box
And that’s the way you do it
It’s my dick in a box… my dick in a box babe
It’s my dick in a box, my dick in a box girl
Christmas… dick in a box
Hanukkah… dick in a box
Kwanzaa.. a dick in a box
Every single holiday a dick in a box
Over at your parent’s house a dick in a box
Mid day at the grocery store a dick in a box
Backstage at the CMA’s a dick in a box (yeah wow wow wow wow)

Myspace class (SNL skit)

Author: Julien  //  Category: Premium Comedy

A funny SNL skit about MySpace. Andy Samberg teaches a class for people that want to learn about myspace and how to create a myspace account (creating your profile, myspace layouts…). As it turns out most of the students are not teens. Funny but kinda scary too!

Will Ferrell Confronts Global Warming

Author: Julien  //  Category: Premium Comedy

In this video clip Will Ferrell does a great impersonation of George W. Bush. It’s amazing how much Will Ferrell actually sounds like the President. In this particular skit Will Ferrell (as George W. Bush) discusses the issue of global warming while on his ranch in Texas. It’s pure comedy. Not much else to say just enjoy the video!

This is the first post in the Premium Comedy Section. This section is not very relevant to the PremiumPosts.com theme but I thought it would provide a few laughs and I wanted a section for comedy since it is a major part of my life. Besides… I am always coming across funny things while I search for content and products to write about so I figured I would share it with my readers! Let me know if you would like to see more comedy or if you think I should kill the comedy idea…